When I was eight years old or so, Cabbage Patch kids were huge. We’re talking, lines out the door to get those dolls with the “authentic” adoption certificate. The only thing that separated the dolls from actual adopted babies was that they came with their “birth” names.
Mine was Sophia Charlotte.
The thought of Cabbage Patch kids now makes me cringe. But back then, it comforted me to hug Sophia at night because she was adopted too…and I had to take care of her and save her from the mean adoptive mother and father who shared the house with us.
Adoption isn’t something to be joked about. Especially when you are the one who is being entrusted to care for a child.
Please, for the love of all that is good and shiny in the world, DON’T COMPARE YOUR ADOPTED CHILD TO CABBAGE PATCH KID DOLLS.
Who am I addressing in this post?
Why, it’s one of the blogs that hasn’t been disqualified from the Circle of Moms fiasco, of course…
The link will take you to the post that I’m fired up about. Check out the last paragraph and tell me whether that sounds supportive or positive to you.
Go ahead. I’ll wait.
What’s that you say? You couldn’t even get past the first sentence? Well, here, let me help you out.
I’ve posted about this blog before. Disliked it then…dislike it even more now.
"However, they may be justified in confusing his doll like status because with these glasses on I think he could totally pass for a Cabbage Patch Kid. Man, wouldn't adoption be so much easier if we could just tell our kids that they sprouted from a cabbage patch? Or even explaining child birth? That's it. I've just made the executive decision. I'm erasing all prior history and until I decide otherwise, it is now official that ALL of my children came from the cabbage patch. And on that note, I've also decided that I must now go and teach my children how to dance the cabbage patch because it's a critical life skill- like math or brushing your teeth or removing rodents from your hair." ~ Megan
A million times more, in fact.
Ugh Christina, I think the competition needed to rename itself open for pro-adoption advocates - or rather thse who want to live in la la land. I am sure she was sort of taking the piss but it doesn't come across well at all...
ReplyDeleteI had a cabbage patch kid doll too when I was 11 - never sent th aoption papers off though and liked the fact it came with a birth certificate... now I feel sick thinking of what it represents and what the world really means when it talks about adoption...
"Man, wouldn't adoption be so much easier if we could just tell our kids that they sprouted from a cabbage patch?" Erasing history?!
ReplyDeleteICK. And my response is "Man, wouldn't adoption be so much easier if adoptive parents knew what they hell they were doing?"
Pardon my french! Btw, love your blog...Megan's NOT so much.
Two
The whole site is filled with drivel. They should change the name to "Circle of Morons".
ReplyDeleteOh come now, Christina dear, that blog is so like supportive and positive about adoption! Didn't you laugh about the cabbage patch thing? Wasn't that positively hilarious? Doesn't it support the mythology of "as if born to" adoptive parents? If you think otherwise, you must simply be a bitter adoptee who had a terrible life and are probably a horrible mother yourself. Bless your bitter adoptee heart, I will pray for you.
ReplyDelete/sarc
Ok - in all honesty now. WHAT THE HELL???? I am sitting here crying this morning. I am one of those women's whose "loving sacrifice" is so casually dismissed. It is women like the author of that blog post who dance on the remains of my broken heart.
Circle of Morons is definitely more appropriate, Linda.
Uh, adoption would be so much eaiser if our adoptive parents didn't do insensitive and idiotic things like declare that our actual history means nothing and that we might as well come from the freaking Cabbage Patch. Her little adoptling will no doubt be an adoptee rights blogger someday. That whole screening process thing is really working, let me tell you.
ReplyDelete"Man, wouldn't adoption be so much easier if we could just tell our kids that they sprouted from a cabbage patch?" Erasing history?!"
ReplyDeleteWowzers. I think the majority of adopters feel the same way. It would be so much easier on THEM if they didn't have pesky biological families and genes lingering the background.
I haven't been feeling good all morning and thanks to this I am officially sick.
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteUmmmm...I am not Melynda...but she is a dear friend of mine and I have a feeling that she'd be offended by your patronizing tone, much the same as I am.
ReplyDeleteI am an adoptee. You'd know that if you had been a reader of mine for a very long time.
I am offended by anyone, not just you, saying that they would tell their children (adopted, biological, whatever) that they came from the cabbage patch. It's offensive. Plain and simple.
Really Megan! You just thanked a First Mom for her "sacrifice" in "choosing" to give up her baby.
ReplyDeleteHow dare you even try to offer your condescending reply and then claim, for even a second, that you somehow have any clue about adoption outside of your own sheltered world and view on the realities.
I firmly believe you are one that doesn't even really look into any of the claims, the research, the facts, that are made available about the the truth of adoption.
Instead you just brush it off, offer a insulting pat on the back to those who have lost for your gain and then try to seem so wise and knowledgeable in your responses to those of us who just really don't measure up anyhow in your view of things.
Today is probably not my day to answer you but I am so tired, so worn out, so disgusted by comments like yours that show absolutely no regard no respect, no kindness for those who have lost.
You know best because you were worthy of adopting a child and you certainly aren't going to waste your time doing any more than offering insulting condolences because that is so much easier than ever taking the time to learn for yourself about the truths we tell.
Sorry Christina for going off on your blog. I am just so tired and worn out by the attitudes of so many when it comes to the truth of adoption.
Megan deleted her comment before I had a chance to read it, but I will second what Cassie said because I have a good idea of what it said. I have read the same comment from people just like her, I am sure.
ReplyDeleteYou have some nerve, Megan but your response is so typical of the condescending arrogance of so many adopters.
Why don't you open your mind and attempt to learn from the truths so many natural mothers speak, rather than being just another self righteous, entitled holier than thou adopter?
I won't hold my breath...
Come on folks - SCREEN CAPTURE EVERYTHING. Haven't we learned that by now? ;) I know I certainly have. Screen capture and IP address tracking, baby. That's the only way to do this adoption blogging stuff.
ReplyDeleteI did read her response but simply lack the ability to respond for all the reasons you point out, Christina. When I read it, I just kind of shook my head and went, "You *REALLY* don't get this, do you?" If she did, she would NOT be joking about her adopted son's loss of heritage and natural family AT ALL. E.V.E.R. And CERTAINLY not in a public forum. Not even once.
My favorite part of all of this? How Megan points out in her original blog post that teaching her children to ignore their origins is like "removing rodents from your hair." Isn't that great imagery? Natural mothers and families are like rodents in the hair of adoptive parents. At least she is honest about how she feels, eh?
*sigh* Like I have said before, the more things change in adoption-land, the more they stay the same.
I am speechless. I am not often speechless.
ReplyDeleteShe also refers to her children as "messed up". Which is a great start to the blog post. It's only fitting that she negate their natural history, and refer to it has rodents in her hair.
She is what is wrong with adoption and why there are those of us who fight for reform. Not okay!