Tuesday, November 23, 2010

What Is An Object?

Definition of OBJECT

a : something material that may be perceived by the senses
b : something that when viewed stirs a particular emotion (as pity)

a : something mental or physical toward which thought, feeling, or action is directed
b : something physical that is perceived by an individual and becomes an agent for psychological identification
a : the goal or end of an effort or activity 
b : a cause for attention or concern 

An object is NOT…

a child. A child is not something that is to be coveted. A child is not an object to be shunned just because you don’t have one.

However, according to this blogger, a child IS an object, as is pregnancy itself.

“It’s easy for the children to become a representation of all that you want, and so far, don’t have.”

So here’s the thing. Maybe I’m not so different from this blogger after all. As a child, I totally and completely coveted my friends’ parents and their lives. I wanted to be in a family that was my own. The huge difference is, I wasn’t allowed to leave the room just because I didn’t look like my adoptive relatives. I couldn’t tell my mother, “Hey, can you move me to a different table because I don’t look like the cousins?”.


  1. As someone who doesnt have children and is in no way ready...I can not wrap my mind around these adoptive parents and their tunnel vision! I just dont get it. It seems so obvious yet there is no way to get them to "get it" and I find myself sitting in my office trying not to scream (or be a complete bitch to everyone because I cant scream)...
    I feel at this moment that I am merely a body built of frustration and covered in a Katy suit...
    With Love,

  2. I'm not even sure they are trying to adopt at this point..just that they are struggling with infertility. But I agree. The sentiment that is being thrown out there is hideous regardless.

  3. Its the desperation that is dangerous. These are the types who adopt and then completely diminish the child's losses. You know, because it was all about them. I feel bad for their families. Im sorry, but to shun family member's children because you cant have one of your own is just sick and twisted. I wouldn't let her hold my baby.

  4. I wouldn't even let them have my dog. And I hate my dog.

  5. The blogger isn't trying to adopt or get pregnant. If you click on "Home" - you'll see that this is actually the site for a "nonprofit providing education, resources, and support for those touched by infertility or adoption."

  6. @Jennifer: So that makes it okay for her to refer to children as "objects"?

  7. However, I do find her somewhat fair and balanced compared to many out there. You might want to take a look at some of her other blog posts etc.

  8. Just wanted to say thanks for your sweet comment on my blog. I am most definitely thankful for you. You have been such a wonderful support to me. Hope you had a fantastic holiday with your family. <3


Share your words of wisdom with the rest of the class. :)