Sunday, December 5, 2010


My natural mom and sister came out to visit for the weekend and to see Maddie sing at the Holiday Stroll in town.  My sister ended up going out to see some of her friends in the area Friday night so my mother and I got a chance to talk.

C: I found him.  On Facebook.

Me: Him?  Who, my ex?  Yeah, I found him too..haha.

C:  No, HIM.  He's in North Carolina...married, looks like he has two step-daughters.

Me:  (shocked) 

C:  I wanted to tell you before I wrote see what you thought.  To see if you WANTED me to write him.  I'm not sure what he'll say.  He might end up telling me to fuck off...but I'd rather he say that to me, than to you.

Me:  Makes sense.  I guess I'd just want him to know that I only want to talk to him if he wants to talk to me, you know?

C:  (hugging me)  I know.

She showed me his Facebook profile picture.  The rest of his page was relatively private.  His wife looks a bit kooky...but whatever.  Couldn't really see details on the picture.  But now I find myself obsessed with finding out more.  I'm not sure whether he'll want to talk to me...seeing as he sent back all of C's letters and never responded to her phone calls before I was born...but maybe he's changed.  Stranger things have happened, right?

I'm prepared for whatever...just still in shock I guess. 


  1. Wow, that is exciting and probably a bit scary. The internet is a pretty good tool for adoptees, I have a friend who found her sister who was given away for adoption, and as a result found out that she had 3 other sisters who were also given up and is now in contact with all of them. I had a cousin who we never knew about find my blog, and we found out that my dad had an older ½ brother. We are now exchanging pictures and stories over FaceBook. Now if only some one who knew my mom’s mom would show up…a girl can dream right?

  2. I hope he wants to have some contact with you. I am not adopted but I can relate. i have had no contact with my dad in a coons age. My sister does. He literally moved from 2 towns away and notified me with a freaking Christmas card 6 months later. He had driven to see my sister and say goodbye but told her not to tell me. I thought he just wasn't responding to the notes I'd leave at the house. Duh. Someone else lived there and i didn't know. I found him on the net too. I didn't write to ask to friend him as it seemed like he was pretty clear how he feels about me. I did notice he only has 4 other friends though. My sister and 2 step kids and one I don't know.

  3. Wow!!! But- I don't think you should have your N Mom contact him. I think it should be you. Of course, it is your choice, but since she obviously doesn't have a good track record with him, I would do it yourself. Keep us posted, girl!

  4. Holy Moly!! How wonderful, yet probably anxiety ridden that news must be.

    I wish you luck with contacting your dad ~ however you wish to do that. I kinda agree with Linda that you should be the one to do the contacting.

  5. Wow! That was out of nowhere!! Are you ok? I mean, really ok? How are you feeling about everything? Still in a bit of shock, I'm sure! Wow! I, too, agree with Linda. If you really want contact with him, you should be the one to do it. I have always gone through my n-mom and that's probably a huge reason why I have yet to talk to him myself. Big hugs and keep me posted! :)


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