Friday, March 1, 2013

Oh Brother!

Back in October, I found my natural paternal brother,D.  I emailed him…but didn’t hear back.  Honestly, it didn’t look like he’d checked his FBook in months, so I wasn’t really surprised.  I looked on his friend list to see if my other brother was there, but didn’t see his name.  Hmmm..back to square one.

So now we fast forward to last week.  I checked a few of D’s friends on the off chance that one of THEM was friends with M, my other brother, and OMG.

I found him.  He’s a tattoo artist based out of Virginia.  I emailed him..trying to break the news of my existence very gently, even paying the lousy $1.00 to get my FBook email to his regular inbox instead of that stupid “Other” one.  I waited on pins and needles for a response. 

And then, finally, four hours later…

“Oh cool!!  Nice to meet ya Christina!! :-) “

I wrote back that I was so glad he’d gotten my message and that is was great to meet him too.  I haven’t written him further because I am not sure what to say.  I don’t want to scare him off.  I have a billion questions but somehow can’t seem to formulate a complete thought when it comes to this.   I want to ask about D…want to reassure them both that I’m not going to write our father about any of this because they, like me, are estranged from him.  But how to bring that up?...especially because he didn’t write back after I did… I’m feeling all adopted and shit and am not sure whether he’s truly happy or whether he’s just being kind.

AAAAAAAAAAARGH…lol.  I’m a frigging train wreck.


  1. Yay! So awesome that you got a response from your brother! I bet he's waiting for you to take the lead in the conversation. I truly hope everything goes well from this point forward. Sending positive energy your way...

  2. Wow. Well, it's a good sign he's friendly but, yeah, what to say?
    Keeping you in my thoughts this weekend!

  3. Oh Christina! I am so happy you have had contact!!

    It must be really hard to know where to go from here but I am hoping he responds and contact progresses. Sending much love!!


  4. Take the lead, and hoping all works well. Would it be a horrible imposition to ask you to email me some time?
    I am trying to help my 8 y/o with search for his first mother and I really need to talk to someone who has walked this road.

  5. Yay, Christina, for his positive response! "I'm feeling all adopted and shit..." I often feel "all adoptive parent and shit." My kid sassed me. Is it normal kid crap or is she expressing some deep adoption wound? She is distraught at the thought of donating, handing-down, or throwing away (almost) anything. Is she just super-sentimental or is it related to subconscious abandonment fears? Sending you positive thoughts and prayers, Christine. And also reflecting on how strong you've shown yourself to be. You've been to hell and back more than once, and you stay standing. Wishing you well with this latest!

  6. Feeling all adopted and shit, love it, can totally relate to that. He might be scared but be real, not too needy and see where it goes. Advice I could have used not too long ago when I scared the crap out of my natural half sister, she ran for the hills and hasn't looked back. Don't drink and stalk your natural family lol


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